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Category Archives: Alexander Voulgaris

Let’s see: Alex is working on a movie about a communist mom and her relationship to her son, but both characters are performed by one and the same female actress, so if you take away the gender-confusion of a female performing a female and a male role, Alex’s movie might as well be a movie about mother-daughter relationships and how these are affected by Greek communism. The name of the mom in his movie is Νίκη/Nike which is the Greek word for “victory”, so the mother’s name is basically “Victoria”. Lo behold, today I discovered this Bulgarian 2014 indie film by female filmmaker Maya Vitkova called, oh yes, Виктория or”Viktoria” which she claims is a semi-autobiographical tale about  mother-daughter relationships set in the 1970s and early 1990s in Bulgaria under communist rule and after the fall of Soviet communism, which is the exact same time period that Alex’s upcoming film is set. COINCIDENCE?

Here is Maya Vitkova explaining her movie Виктория/Viktoria:

And here is what she said on IMDB (which makes her the only if not one of the few filmmakers ever to address their film viewers on IMDB in the comments):

Author: mayvitkovitz from Bulgaria
2 June 2015

The key situations in Viktoria are stories that happened in my own life, but the willingness to tell them is not an obsession for psychoanalysis or a self cure. The motive to write Viktoria links to the story Kurosawa tells at the very beginning of his autobiographical book. A healing frog in a box with mirror walls, frightened by its own reflection, starts secreting an oily secretion similar to sweat. They used to boil this sweat on a faint fire for days and that’s how produced a miraculous cure. According to Kurosawa, to write about yourself, is similar to being locked between four walls covered with mirrors and stare at yourself. And although you’re not a frog, you feel sweat streaming down your body… Storytelling is a mission, one of the few ways to change human lives. To write stories and turn them into films, which truly regenerate the humanity, the human spirit, you odd [ought?] to be honest. To lock yourself into the mirror box and examine you from top to toe, to tell a story of a moment in your life which somehow changed you, a story, that can thus help turning the lives of those who see it better. I do hope that the cure – the film – I prepared out of my „sweat”, will be healing for the people who use it for their „wounds”. That’s the reason I wrote Viktoria.

http://www.imdb.com/title/tt3400872/reviews?ref_=tt_urv

Wow, that sounds like a student of Jodorowsky’s brand of Psychomagic Psychobabble right there (doesn’t Alejandro always say he wants to make movies that heal?), but anyway, onwards to the movie itself class! Study this film-trailer for Виктория/Viktoria closely and diligently:

Synopsis
Dreaming of the West, Boryana is determined not to have a child in communist Bulgaria. Nonetheless, her daughter Viktoria enters the world in 1979, curiously missing a belly button, and is declared the country’s Baby of the Decade. Pampered by her mother state until the age of nine, Viktoria’s decade of notoriety comes crashing down with the rest of European communism. But can political collapse and the hardship of new times finally bring Viktoria and her reluctant mother closer together?

The film follows three generations of women in the final years of the People’s Republic of Bulgaria and the early years of the new government, focusing on reluctant mother Boryana and her daughter, Viktoria, who in one of the film’s surreal, magical touches is born without an umbilical cord. Though unwanted by her mother, Viktoria is named the country’s Baby of the Decade, and is showered with gifts and attention until the disintegration of the East Bloc. Despite throwing their worlds off balance, the resulting political changes also allow for the possibility of reconciliation.

You will see that there are several scenes here which in another context would have been pedophilic, such as an image of a baby’s bare bottom and another quick shot where a girl’s pair of underwear is cut off with scissors. I obviously haven’t seen the movie itself but everything about this trailer suggests that Maya Vitkova’s Виктория/Viktoria is a movie that touches on the subject of sexual child abuse under communism.

This surreal excerpt from the movie of a young girl dressed up like a mix between Kenny from the animation  Southpark and Little Red Riding Hood being pushed over by a gigantic hand, again suggests that Виктория/Viktoria is a movie about child abuse:

Then there is this excerpt of what appears to be a catholic priest or lawyer’s gown in a tub of water spreading a cloud of blood:

Another scene which suggests child abuse:

And this scene of a piano recital reminds me of those stories that Alex used to tell in interviews, where he said he was being paraded around like a trophy by the Greek communists after he and his sister joined the Greek Communist Youth organization at the ripe old age of 12, and Alex saying that he considers this experience of being paraded around by the communists in his youth “akin to child pornography”:


The communist context of the movie is made explicit in the following somewhat parodic  excerpt:

So, let’s take this from the top again:

1) Alex is making a movie where the mom character is called Νίκη/Nike or Victoria. Two years ago Vitkova already released a an indie movie called Виктория/Viktoria, which is the name of the daughter in her movie.

2) Alex’s mom character Νίκη is a communist, Виктория/Viktoria takes place during communist rule in Bulgaria with the mother and daughter being celebrated by the communist regime.

3) The time period of the events in Alex’s film is the 1970s and 1990s, Виктория/Viktoria likewise takes place in the 1970s and the early 1990s.

4) Виктория/Viktoria is about mother-daughter relationships, Alex’s movie is about mother-son relationships but the two main characters, the mother and the son, are both interpreted by a single female actress.

5) Alex is a pedophilia apologist; Виктория/Viktoria‘s trailer suggests that this movie touches on the subject of sexual child abuse under communism, with many scenes suggesting or depicting child abuse.

6) Alex said in interviews that being paraded around by the communists after joining the Greek Communist Youth organization as preteen was a very traumatic experience for him which felt “akin to child pornography”; Vitkova’s girlchild character Viktoria is paraded around by the communists in Bulgaria as the “Baby of the Decade”, in a movie that Vitkova claims is semi-autobiographical. Alex’s mom is a communist who still in public interviews will refer to other leftists in Greece as “comrades” and is a former card-carrying member of the Greek Communist Party. Vitkova claims that Виктория/Viktoria is about trying to restore her relationship to her mother after the fall of communism.

I’m sure Alex would say that he has never seen Виктория/Viktoria and that these similarities are all a big coincidence, but I have come across so many male artists ripping off lesser known female artists that I am extremely supicious. Obviously there are other films that depict mother-child relationships under communism or the post-communism transition period (the German film Goodbye Lenin would be a well-known example amongst my contemporaries), but the above similarities should raise an eyebrow.

Δεν την φυλάει κανείς, uh-huh
Φοβούνται μην τους μείνει αδειο το κελί της
Μα όλο γελάει αυτή, uh-huh
Θέλει το πτώμα να βρουν
Και να παριστούν πως τάχα δεν μπορούν
Να την φανταστούν ωμή
Πως είναι μόνο κρέας αυτή
Και έτσι θα αρχίσει να χωράει
Μες την πληγή το μαχέρι

Έλα να δεις κι εσύ το μαύρο – η μάλλον κόκκινο – χάλι που έκανε ο Άλεξ την Σοφία Κόκκαλη στο νέο του music video. Η απόλυτη δηθενιά και αναισθησία να παριστάνει την συναισθηματικότητα. Χίλιες φορές προτιμότερα να έβλεπα την Κόκκαλη να την έδενε ο Vinny Winn Kyle με τις πορτοκαλι μπλούζες του όπως έλεγε ο Vinny στο βίντεο για την Μικρά Αγγλία 😀 Δεν ανέφερα καν που η ιδέα πίσω από αυτό το τραγούδι και βίντεο είναι 100% κλεμένη από το βίντεο και τους στίχους του Liar του Henry Rollins σε σκηνοθεσία του Ολλανδού Anton Corbijn, το βαμμένο κόκκινο πρόσωπο, τα γαλλία, οι στίχοι για την μοναξιά, οι γκριματσες, όλα πρωτοφανές, όλα κλεμμενα –>

And since we are on the topic, here is Alex’s mom the communist before a class of highschool students in Greece openly admitting to these kids that she lies during interviews:

12:54 Δεν μπορω να δωσω τις 50 συνεντεύξεις που μου ζητάνε, γιατί, ακόμα και τις 3 η 4 που δίνω πιάνω τον εαυτόν μου πολλές φορές και να επαναλαμβάνω, να κάνω νιάνιά τα ίδια και τα ίδια όταν είναι και ας πούμε και παροιμίες οι ερωτήσεις, και έχω πιάσει πολλές φορές τον εαυτόν μου να λέει ψέματα.

Translation: I cannot give the 50 interviews that are requested of me, because, even with the 3 or 4 interviews that I do give, I catch myself repeating, yapping the same old same things when the questions are the same, let’s say, and I’ve also many times caught myself lying.

Well, this is certainly refreshing for yours truly, to have a liar like Alex’s communist mom Ioanna Karystiani openly admit before a class of children and even openly on Youtube by extention that she lies during interviews, because most of the liars I profile here on the blog as rule will staunchly deny being liars and will instead accuse me of being a liar for painstakingly documenting and exposing their lies. How refreshing is this indeed! 😀 Maybe it’s a Greek thing because in my experience Americans are always shocked and offended to the core of their being when someone manages catches to them in a lie. I obviously wish people had it together enough that they didn’t have to lie at all, but if I had to choose then I think I  prefer the Greek approach of openly lying and openly admitting it and consider this to be more healthy than the aggressive American denialism I generally have to deal with. Why can’t Americans be more like Alex’s communist mom and just admit that they too will lie in public?

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This short story is a work of fiction and bears no relation to existing people or events.

Drowned Americans Watching TV at the Bottom of the Aegean
(short story)

by drs. Efthimia Dilpizoglou
(c) 2016 all rights reserved
referenced works are (c) to their respective creators

The Not-So-Genteel Catlady wearing her mermaid costume dives all the way to the bottom of the Aegean, as deep as she can go. The Catlady Catfishlady feels a strong urge to take a bite from her fishtail.  Instead she flaps her tail harder and harder and away from her to avoid the tempting smell of fish. Reaching the bottom of the sea she finds the bloated sunken  corpses of drowned American refugees and an old TV set, likely a unit that accidentally fell of a Chinese container shipment. She turns on the TV which is fully functional even at the bottom of the Aegean, and watches the following music video –>

 

All of this is possible because the waters farther than 200 nautical miles from shore are generally outside of national jurisdiction and largely beyond government control. More than 40 percent of the planet’s surface is covered by water that belongs to everyone and no one, and is relatively lawless and unregulated.

Over the next two years, though, the United Nations intends to change this reality. After nearly a decade of discussion, it ratified a resolution in June to begin drafting the first treaty to protect biodiversity on the high seas.

The agreement will create a formal process for setting aside protected marine areas in international waters. Unlike on land, there is no legal framework on the high seas for creating areas that are off-limits to commercial activity. The treaty will also create procedures for environmental impact assessments and establish a method for the public to be informed about large-scale projects in these waters, including fishing, seabed mining, shipping, research and other activities.

http://www.nytimes.com/2015/08/02/sunday-review/protecting-the-untamed-seas.html?_r=0

AlexAnimalCruelty

“Is that a fish in a plastic bag in the water?” wonders the Catfishlady. “I should inform the animal rights organizations about this.”

AlexAnimalCruelty2

“Is that man holding a fish in his mouth?”, wonders the Catfishlady. “Now I am really getting hungry. Delicious fish.”. She puts her tail in her mouth and holds it there, using all her willpower to keep herself from biting through. “I should inform the animal rights organizations about this.”, she says robotically.

“That bandaged figure…” she says, pointing at the character identified as The Mummy in the credits, “Someone must’ve been watched Goodnight Mommy at the last edition of the Thessaloniki Film Festival. Either that or they must’ve bought the Almodovar loss-leader DVD with that newspaper.”

AlexTetsuoRipoff

“Yeah, yeah, I know every film nerd on the planet is obsessed with Tetsuo, whatever.”, says the Catfishlady rolling her eyes to the back of her eyesockets, showing only the white of a fish eye getting popped in the process of being cooked.

I have discovered Alexander Voulgaris’ secret Youtube channel, and it appears Alex has finally learned how to make decent movies! Behold his filmmaking progress, moving forward with great strides towards cinematic greatness! Amazing! –>

FIRST EVER SELFIE VIDEO!

PUSH THE LIKE BUTTON FOR SUPPORTING MY CHANNEL Y’ALL!

EYEBALL HUMOUR!

ALEX THE ANIMAL LOVER!

ALEX TAKES THE PISS!

CRAB BUCKET!

 

 

The following blog entry is pure fiction and bears no relationship to existing people or events.

In Bed With Mr. V (short story)
by drs. Efthimia Dilpizoglou
(c) 2015 all rights reserved

The Blogger was lying in bed with mr V., a former Greek Minister of Finances and his hot blonde wife who was already fast asleep on his manly chest. The Blogger liked getting herself stuck between sweaty couples. The smell there was something else. Mr. V kisses his wife on her forehead.

“I haven’t fucked like this since I became Minister of Finances.” says mr. V. “Θεε μου, I really needed that.”.

“You know,” says the Blogger, “There are 11 000 000 people ready to fuck you, your wife and your friend Alex in gratitude of your service to the country.”. Mr V. smiles contently. “What will you do next? Besides fucking them all, that is?”
“I will go back to teaching.”
“Harvard?” asks the Blogger.
“No, I don’t want to run into George again.”
“But George is in the social studies department. Economics is another department at the other side of the campus.”, points out the Blogger.
“I’ve been there before, Harvard is a small world, a village of political power within an academic village.”. Mr. V reaches out to carress the Blogger’s hairy beaver, but the beaver snaps at his hand and crawls back into the river where it swims away in disgust. With the beaver out of the way, mr. V reaches between the legs of the Blogger. Her lips are sealed tight. Straight into her eyes he sees with no smile. She looks back with a “don’t even try, professor” stare. He smiles ironically and caresses the Blogger’s X-legs.

“Who else had the privilege of sharing the bed with you?” she insists.
“Don’t tell anyone…” says mr. V and whispers into her ear: “Fidel.”
“THE CUBAN?!”
“Shhh!” hushes mr. V. “No, no, no another minister of finances.”.
“Wow, you and Zoe and Alex are really out to fuck whomever you can lay your hands on, aren’t you?”. The Blogger raises an eyebrow, then moves herself between the legs of mr. V, who helpfully makes space for her.
“Do you know what it’s like to be fucked in the mouth every day by the likes of Angela, Jeroen, Martin, Mario, Wolfgang? Euromeeting upon euromeeting of them lining up to fuck you. I won’t even go into the the psycho-dynamics of all-night sessions to manufacture agreement.”
“As of tonight, I will know what it’s like to be fucked in the mouth by the former Greek minister of finances.”, thinks the Blogger to herself as she unrolls the condom.
“I’ve never been fucked in the mouth by Germans.”, admits the Blogger in a rare moment of personal honesty. “I only know what it’s like to be raped every day in the mouth by Americans and the Dutch.”. 
Staring down at the unrolled condom she thinks to herself, “I’m surprised I can still do this.”.
Mr. V caresses her hair. With every deep sigh getting deeper and deeper, mr. V releases το Γρυλισμα from within himself. The political animal.
Looking down at the Blogger it laughs. “If only the professional S&M pornographer were still here to see you like this…”.
“I never thought I’d see you here.”. says the Blogger from between the legs of mr. V. “If he were still here to see me like this he’d film it and demand that I sign away my rights on a release form. Because surely no one has ever seen a Greek woman getting fucked in the mouth by her political representatives. Where were you all these years? Hiding under a rock?”

The Blogger senses the flesh of the rockhardon of mr. V in her mouth. The condom’s ripped. Shocked, she pulls her mouth up and away from the disaster scene as fast as she can, minimizing skin contact. Nevertheless, she is left with that semi-rotten egg taste on her tongue that can only mean one thing. She looks up, expecting to see το Γρυλισμα laughing at her, but it is gone.
“Where are you?” she demands angrily.
“Here, here!” says το Γρυλισμα from within her mouth.
The Blogger looks down and sees a brand new unripped condom pointing at her in anticipation.
“FUCKER!” she shouts and spits a mouthful of το Γρυλισμα on the floor next to the bed.
“Don’t ever freak me out like that!” she barks as το Γρυλισμα laughs. “You only play safe?”
“We’re all doomed to oblivion, there is no such thing as safety so I only play it safe.”, says the Blogger, and resumes her civic responsibility as a Greek woman somewhere between the legs of the former Greek minister of finances and his wife.

Το Γρυλισμα nestles itself behind the Blogger’s butt and pulls her legs slightly appart. The Blogger’s pussy hisses at him like a cat. Alarmed, the Blogger looks up and over her shoulder. “You are not gonna do that!”, she warns.
“I just want to have a good look at this Greek mess unfolding before me.”, says το Γρυλισμα running one of its slimy tentacles between the folds.
“Oh no, it’s trying to do that manga ferries thing again.”, thinks the Blogger to herself, and το Γρυλισμα reading her thoughts agrees.
“When a Greek girl says no she means NO!”, hisses the pussy again. Tο Γρυλισμα backs off and the Blogger goes back to minding mr. V.
Licking it’s one lucky tentacle, το Γρυλισμα “mmm!”-s appreciatively. “You taste pretty sweet for such a sour little Greek cunt.”
“It’s not me, it’s the vegan food…”, admits the Blogger apologetically. “I try to lay off the vegan food, I try to eat as many σουβλακια as I humanly can, but… oh, it’s so bad, you can taste it off of me.”. To exculpate herself, she offers: “Meat is so expensive right now, and has become so scarce with the price control embargoes…”.
Το Γρυλισμα was about to suggest that they take the Midnight Meat Train together sometime for a decent meal, but it is once again distracted by the folds, thinking of kusudama and ferries.

The Blogger looks up, and there she is. It’s her. The white worker’s uniform, the golden Xian Orthodox cross on a chain, the Nihon-koku flag with the black sun. Silent Zachary, Szach for short, editor and chief photographer of the dreaded Black Blood publication, was standing there at the head of the bed, aiming her camera straight at the Blogger. The Blogger with a condom in her mouth, looking up at Zachary, realizing there’s no way out of this one. “You’d make a good centerfold for the next issue.”, smirks Szach and presses the button on her camera, firing a sure shot.

The Blogger wakes up screaming.

References

Silent Zachary and Το Γρυλισμα appear courtesy of ΜΟΥΣΙΚΟ ΚΙΝΗΜΑ: (ΜΑΥΡΕΣ) ΤΡΙΧΕΣ.

Silent Zacharia is a character from the book Black Blood by Alexander Voulgaris.

 

In response to the following comment by Nostalzi which I found in my inbox:

> WTF.

Yes, and good hello to you to too :\

> You are attacking Voulgaris for advocating pedophilia.

That’s right and I am still surprised I am the only one who is calling him out on his pedo-friendly posturing. If you or I or anyone we know were posting comments on Facebook listing a de facto banned child pornography movie amongst our all-time favourites the way Alexander does when he off-handedly mentions and causally sneaks in the child pornography movie Maladolescenza into his list of his favourite movies, we would not be receiving film funding from the Greek government or glowing profiles all over the free press. We would be receiving a battalion of cops at our front doors busting our door down for promoting de facto child pornography on the internet. No one even realized Alexander was praising a de facto child pornography movie when he mentioned Maladolescenza. I bet you yourself didn’t look it up either to see what type of a movie it was and if you did you clearly didn’t care enough to show that you care. Which just goes to show the cultural acumen that Alexander commands in Greece amongst the hipster crowd: people uncriticially swallow whatever he posts on Facebook, much to his perverse delight I’d imagine.

> You are entitled in your opinion, but please.

Read what I wrote, read the articles I linked up to. Do some research like I did. It’s not my “opinion”, it’s the opinion of the courts of two Western countries both of which are known to be sexually more open-minded than any other country on the planet. It’s their courts that have declared this movie unacceptable and criminal and contraband child pornography.

> To state my reply to your questions, during his screenings he would show movies of pornographic content, but nothing out of the ordinary.

Well, thank you for clearing that one up, but who are YOU again to judge what is to be considered “ordinary”? Are you a sexuologist? How dare you declare yourself an authority on what people consider to be sexually “normal”?

> Nothing that people do not do with their partners in their bedroom.

And how would you know this, again? How do you know what people are up to in their bedrooms? Do they let you in while they are at it so you can have a look? If that’s the case you know you can make a killing blogging about THAT! XD

> If you never had sex with your partner, no matter what male or female, then I can see how you are shocked by such contents.

Hahahahahaha. Are you saying I am a prude because I hate child pornography? *Whatevaaah*

And I am sorry, I am not going to discuss my private sex life with someone who is arrogant enough to declare themselves an authority on the topic of people’s sex lives and what is to be considered “normal” or “ordinary”. People’s sex lives have absolutely nothing whatsoever to do with the topic at hand: Alexander gets to adovocate an illegal activity, in this case child pornography, because he is “the son of”, whereas virtually any other person who would do the same thing would be loudly condemned and shunned if not subject to criminal charges.

> I never felt uncomfortable with his movies, I never felt he was showing cases of abuse, or pedophilia.

That’s nice for you, I commend your state of desensitization, but again, what does your “feeling” about the movies he was showing you and the other kids in class have to do with the topic I am raising? Which is that someone is being let of the hook because he is a member of a cultural oikogeniocracy in Greece?

> This is ridiculous. Instead of attacking pop artists, greek or not, who are being adored by millions and constantly degrade women and their bodies, who treat the female human body as if it is the cheapest meat on the market, as if women’s only role is to decorative, you attack a person that is extremely talented and honest.

Honest about his pedophilia apologetics, you mean? That absolutely. Alexander might not be “adored by millions” (though every single young Greek person I have met and spoken to seems to know his music) but read some of his lyrics, and you will see that he too “constantly degrades women and their bodies, treats the female human body as if it is the cheapest meat on the market, as if women’s only role is to decorative”. The brother of a friend attended Alex and his friend Felizol’s DJ set at the Thessaloniki Film Festival and he told us the entire set was 100% women-degrading R N’B, the Nellies and the Ushers and the R Kellys and 50 Cents and Robin Thicke blurred lines American rape-glorifying bullshit of this world.

Listen very closely to the lyrics of this song by Alex, Blurred Lines is tame compared to this:

And yes, Alexander is admittedly very talented, but he is squandering away that talent with his silly transgression art posturing and his sickening flirtation with pedophilia. I have studied his music closely and I have even translated some of his lyrics. I was originally going to write an essay about his Sunbathing album and it was because I was researching that album that I discovered his pedophilia advocacy and apologetics, became disgusted and decided to write an entirely different essay from the one I originally had in mind. I think he could be writing the next and Greek version of The Wall (by Pink Floyd) but he says he’d rather be making Maladolescenzas and raping children with cameras in his movies. That’s certainly a waste of talent, to put it mildly.

> People in Greece need to open their minds. Seriously.

You know how the saying goes: “If you open your mind too much people will pour a lot of shit into it.”. Alexander advocating child pornography on Facebook without you or anyone else noticing it or saying something about it, that’s someone pouring shit into your wide open mind.

Let me be your drag-king!
Flix.gr’s behind-the-scenes special of Alexander Voulgaris’ upcoming
Greek “Terminator 2” feature Νήμα
by drs. Efthimia Dilpizoglou
(c) 2014 all rights reserved

I was sent a link to Flix.gr’s article about Alexander Voulgaris’ upcoming feature movie Νήμα (“String of Yarn”), which includes a behind-the-scenes promo that his Flix.gr groupies shot on the Νήμα set during the last days of shooting before the film went into post-production. Visit this page to see the behind-the-scenes special at the bottom of the page:

http://www.flix.gr/articles/the-boy-nima-shooting.html

Alexander Voulgaris’ blonde assistant director insists that this movie will be “the most sensitive movie ever made in the history of Greek film” (“η πιο τρυφερή ταινία που γυρίστηκε ποτέ στο ελληνικό σινεμά”), whereas Voulgaris himself claims, in all seriousness and without a trace of irony or humility, that his upcoming movie will be, get this, the Greek “Terminator 2“! Alexander’s Flix.gr groupies, obviously enamoured and spell-bound by their on-set visit and having been given the behind-the-scenes scoop, can hardly contain their enthusiasm and write that it’s “one of those movies you would like to see right now if only that were possible” (“μια από τις ταινίες που θα ήθελες αν γινόταν να δεις τώρα”). This is the usual pre-release hype that Flix.gr builds around Alexander Voulgaris’ movies only to disappoint everyone who gets to see the lackluster end-result. One of the readers’ comments right below the behind-the-scene promo says it all:

http://www.flix.gr/articles/the-boy-nima-shooting.html#comment-1685837152
This comment shows that Greek film-fans are aware of the fact that Flix.gr have always hyped up Alexander’s movies in order to create a pre-screening buzz. Greek film-fans will remember how Flix.gr hyped the living daylights out of Alexander’s 2012 craptastic sci-fi/horror/art-house/WTF-mess of a hybrid movie Higuita, ensuring him a sold-out house at the Thess Film Festival for the premiere, which turned out to be a huge disappointment with people constantly walking out on the film and critics’ overwhelmingly scathing reviews in the following days. I say let them fall into the trap they’ve dug for themselves with their pompous comments about making a Greek Terminator 2, because you know Alexander’s The String of Yarn movie will sell-out whether it’s crap or not, due to his sheer popularity amongst the Athenian hipster quotient who will flock to his movie in droves. I recommend people pull a Marilyn Manson on Alex and do some drugs before the premiere of Νήμα to spare themselves another Higuita-style disappointment.

Having seen the behind-the-scenes promo, I have this to say, and I direct this comment particularly to the blonde assistant director, who apparently has no problem associating herself with a child pornography and pedophilia apologist:

Anyone who writes song-lyrics about, and I quote from his song “feel safe”, released on a record that Alexander Voulgaris has characterized as “my most personal record, the only record I want everyone who knows me well to listen to” (“συνεχίζει να είναι ο πιο προσωπικός μου δίσκος… και ο μοναδικός που πραγματικά θα με ένοιαζε να τον ακούσει κάποιος που με γνωρίζει.”):

Getting my shit ready to pump opposite of little girls photos.
Cumming in a coffee cup.
Don’t wanna mess things up.
Cooking is something that I like these days

Source:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=atx0i9zmjec

Anyone who writes song-lyrics about “getting my shit ready to pump opposite of little girls photos” and cooking with his load is NEVER going to make “the most sensitive movie ever made in the history of Greek film”. NEVER. “…cause I am a fuckin tender teddy bear ready to die in his sleep.”, my ass. “School fucks with teenage queens. Thoughts like that considered sins. “, “I whisper to a kid’s ear that I’ll always remember my first kiss in her front porch.”,  um, is that a teddy bear or rather a pedo-bear he’s singing about in that song? I love it whenever I quote all these lyrics to people, lyrics from a record Alexander Voulgaris said is his “most personal”, and they still insist “he’s just being sarcastic”. People just don’t want to see what’s blatantly obvious. The guy is a pedophilia and child pornography apologist, period. Childrapists don’t molest children because they are “sensitive”, but because they are the very definition of insensitivity and selfishness.

Anyone who lists the de facto banned criminal child pornography movie Maladolescenza as one of his favourite movies is NEVER going to make “the most sensitive movie ever made in the history of Greek film”. NEVER.

Anyone who is being flippant on Facebook about Woody Allen raping his 7 year old daughter with sick ‘jokes’ such as “Woody Allen fucks hard, just ask his daughter.” is NEVER going to make “the most sensitive movie ever made in the history of Greek film”. NEVER.

And how dare he bring up the Terminator 2. Some nerve this guy has. Compare this behind-the-scenes promo on Flix.gr to all the behind-the-scenes videos on Youtube from when James Cameron was shooting the Terminator 2 in the late 1980s. Do you see the Terminator 2 here? I hope Cameron sues him for false advertising. Almost a quarter of a century or 24 years later, the character of Sarah Connor in Terminator 2 is still the most progressive most feminist female character I have seen in any movie, American or foreign, and the only female character I have ever identified myself with as a teenager having to sit through movies with women I did not want to be. Terminator 2 was the only movie that made me go: “I want to be her when I grow up.”. It was the first time I saw a woman in a film who was completely different from all the women I had seen up to then. Terminator 2 is also one of the few movies I have ever seen where no one really dominates. The cyborg who was on the poster really doesn’t, Sarah doesn’t and her son doesn’t. In the Terminator 2 everyone, male, female, young, old, human, cyborg, meatware, software, hardware, the past, the present and the future, they all bond together and allign against a common enemy, the Skynet shape-shifting industrial petro-chemical war-machine that wants to wipe out human life. I don’t think Europeans can phathom how totally against Americans’ hegemonic androcentric sexist perception and understanding a movie like that goes, having been brainwashed their entire lives that someone, invariably a man, always has to be “The Boss” dominating the narrative and overshadowing everyone else. Suffice to say, Terminator 2 is one of my favourite sci-fi movies ever, and anyone who brings up the Terminator 2 is getting fucking personal with me.

Totally disappointed to see that actress Sofia Kokkali agreed to be in this creepy movie because I really liked her having seen her in Alexander’s dad’s Little England last year and sincerely had high hopes for her as a promising young actress. Kokkali doesn’t know what she’s getting herself into. She even admits in the video she had a hard time interpreting both leading roles, that of a mother growing up in the 1970s and her son, a teengaged boy growing up in the 1990s. Only a few female actresses have what it takes to convincingly perform a man, and I don’t expect Alexander Voulgaris’ usual experiments with ADR, like replacing all of Kokkali’s lines as a teenaged boy with a male voice actor, are going to improve her performance, which she herself admits was “difficult”. I know Alexander Voulgaris is obsessed with Kubrick, but I just don’t see Kokkali as his Peter Sellers. I even suspect that Alexander Voulgaris is hiding his sexism and misogyny behind a respected female actress. Remember, boys and girls in film-school, we are talking about the guy who brags on his Facebook wall about making violent S&M porn featuring decapitated women the likes of this (NSFW, graphic). And since we’re bringing up the 1990s, anyone still remember The Prodigy’s Smack My Bitch Up video? It’s a tried and true trick of the sexists to hide their sexism behind female performers. The question is, why do women allow themselves to be used in this way? Surely an actress like Sofia Kokkali would’ve had better offers following Little England?

For those of you poor sods who are actually looking forward to this movie because you bought into the pre-release hype about it being the Greek Terminator 2, let’s hope Alexander Voulgaris uses whatever money he has left from the 90 000 in film-funding he received from the Greek government to hire himself some unemployed Greek CGI and Adobe Premiere wizards, because what I am seeing in Flix.gr’s behind-the-scenes special can be summarized as some lame-ass art-school attempt at filming Chuck Palahniuk’s short story “Guts” with Sofia Kokkali as a pimple-faced drag-king on a depressing abandoned pre-schooler TV studio set with a dead plant in the background. Who is willing to bet all their Greek debt in a hedge fund that Alex will reverse that footage of the leaves dropping in post-production as a low-budget attempt at making it look “cooler”? You need much more than that to achieve “cool” these days, even more than much more to bring a movie like Terminator 2 into the conversation.

Or is this drag-king act Alexander trying to rip off “Ταϊσε με τη σκόνη σου με το γοβάκι σου Καιτούλα” playing Wilhelm Reich’s son in the music video for Cloudbusting? About the last thing oversexed Alex needs is an orgone generator. The best thing you can hope for is that audiences “wake up crying” after falling asleep to an excruciatingly boring and pretentious movie they thought was going to be Terminator 2.

Έτοιμοι (freestyle poem)
by drs. Efthimia Dilpizoglou
(c)2014 all rights reserved

Ready steady go-ho
Ready steady go-ho

Είμαστε έτοιμοι
Η ομάδα είναι έτοιμη
Αντρες για όλα έτοιμοι
Ο ΑΔΑΜ ΣΑΤΑΝΙΣΤΑΣ ΟΙΜΟΙ
Για τις 100 δόσεις έτοιμοι
Για παροχή ρευστότητας έτοιμοι
Για δάγκωμα έτοιμοι
Για τα δύσκολα έτοιμοι
Για το Μέλλον έτοιμοι
Για το μεγαλύτερο έτοιμοι
Να πεθάνω δεν είμαι ακόμα έτοιμη
Σου `χω συγγνώμη έτοιμη
Φιόγκοι έτοιμοι
Πως δείχνετε στους άλλους ότι δεν είσαστε για σχέση έτοιμη;
3 σημάδια για να καταλάβεις αν είναι να προχωρήσει έτοιμη
Να στείλουμε και νέες ενισχύσεις είμαστε έτοιμοι
Να κερδίσουμε έτοιμοι
Αισιόδοξοι έτοιμοι
Οι κάτοικοι να εκραγούν έτοιμοι
Για κάθε είδους πόλεμο πρέπει να είμαστε έτοιμοι
Nα υπερασπιστούμε τη χώρα μας έτοιμοι
Είστε έτοιμη;

Ready steady go-ho
Ready steady go-ho

The following part of this blog entry is poetry and is pure fiction. No relation to existing people or events is implied.

Αγο$

Αγνο$

Αγνο$ (freestyle poem)
by drs. Efthimia Dilpizoglou
(c) 2014 all rights reserved

Είμαι αγνο$
Όταν μπαίνω μέσα σου με βια καυτός
Εμφανίζομαι απρόβλεπτα και σ’ εξαφανίζω σαν κεραυνός
3 δάχτυλα χαμένα μέσα σου ταχυδακτυλουργος
Μαφιόζος, μπράβος
Διεφθαρμένος Ιταλός νονός
1001 νύχτες τώρα τ’ άστρα σβήνουν
Σ’ έναν κόσμο βυθισμένο στο σκοτάδι είμαι το τελευταίο φως
Μου λες, “Πως; Είσαι αυτός;!
Ώστε εσύ είσαι ο Θεός!”
Σου αρέσει το incest-pop του Prince; Απλώς,
Κανε εσύ την sister και θα είμαι εγώ ο αδερφός
Ανταγωνιζόμενος αντιπολίτικος
Από το κράτος στηριζόμενος νεοφιλελεύθερος
Ψυχοαναλιτικοποιημένος
Totally messed up μπερδεμένος
Ψυχαναγκαστικος
Μεσ’απ’εξω και ανακατωτός
I’ll shoot you to the moon and the stars σαν πύραυλος
Πυρηνικός, ειρηνικος, ειρωνικος, πουτακινος,
Χωρίς συντηρητικά συντηρητικός
Χωρίς φρεσκάδα φρεσκότατος
Tasteless γευστικός
Κι’ολα τα κινηματογραφικα βραβεία στον κόσμο να κέρδιζα δεν θα ήμουν τίποτα από ένας φλώρος εγωκεντρικός
“Μα, έχω μια αγνότητα δική μου.”, λέει ο ξεχεσμενος παιδεραστής της αθωότητας εχθρός
Το μαυρόασπρο γατάκι σου που το λέγαν Κουστουμάκι το σκότωσα εγώ ο δολοφόνος
Ακούγοντας εσένα να κλαις με λυγμούς μαλακευομουν χαχανίζοντας συνεχώς
Κουλτουροκαριόλες, να αγοράσετε όλες το αριστούργημα της μάνας μου loss-leader με το ΒΗΜΑ της επόμενης Κυριακής, αλλιώς
Θα γίνει της πουτάνας σας λέω, καζάνι, ξεσηκωμός
Αγνο$ ψεύτης
Αγνο$ κλεφτής
Αγνο$ Ελληνας
Αγνο$ κάτασπρος λευκός
Γαλακτοβούτυρομπεμπεκομπουρεκος
Προστατευομενη Οικογενειοκρατία Προέλευσης Π.Ο.Π. Αγνο$
Κακός, κακιστατος, ακόμα ποιο χειρότερος
Ευτυχώς που δεν είμαι και Ολλανδός

References:

Various songs and Facebook entries by The Boy.