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He says: ανθρώπους να παίζουν πινγκ πονγκ με μάτια
She says: You know what saddens me about this particular line from this movie review? That you probably wrote this just as I was writing the story below about your eyes, your hands and the girl next to you.

The following part of this blog entry is pure fiction and bears no relation to existing people or events.

Your eyes, your hands and the girl next to you (short story)

by drs. Efthimia Dilpizoglou
(c) 2014 all rights reserved

The girl next to you is talking non-stop. It was her first shoot, there is a lot to talk about, but she does all the talking and you say nothing. You are Lou Reed, just there, because you know nothing drives a chick more crazy than a man icing her. These girls put on a raunchy air because they think you like that, but every time you look them in the eye you see a brittle ego silently crying out for help. How desperate they must be to reach out to someone like you for validation. Κύριε δεν πειράζει, κύριε μην σε νοιάζει. Το Γρύλισμα jumps upon your lap and begins crawling up your shirt towards your face, leaving a slimy trail behind. The girl notices and asks whether you spilled soup on your shirt. Instead of telling the truth you lie once again and you say: “Yes, it’s soup, I am a bit clumsy with spoons, I’d rather bring the soup bowl to my face and swallow the soup the way the Japanese used to do.”. Το Γρύλισμα sucks out your left eyeball and chews on it. “Go ahead and suck out the other one.”, you whisper, “I am blind anyway, I can miss ’em both for the sake of symetry.”. Το Γρύλισμα puts its mouth over your other eye and slurps it out. Thank Gawd there aren’t any drinking straws nearby this time, can you imagine what you must’ve looked like with a drinking straw sticking out of your emptied eye-socket? All you can think of as you go blind forever is the scene from Kill Bill 2 where The Bride plucks Elle Driver’s last remaining eye right out of her skull during a swordfight somewhere in a trailer the middle of nowhere. Elle Driver loses her shit on the bathroom floor, smashing into mirrors, screaming: “Bitch, I will kill you.”. You could be doing the same thing, losing your shit on the floor screaming “Γρύλισμα, I will kill you”, but you don’t because you don’t want to scare the girl next to you, she is young and new and you consider her an asset, you would like to cast her in another movie so you keep your cool and act professionally. The Bride squishes Elle Driver’s eye with her bare foot on the floor, which is such a waste of good nutrition, she should’ve fed the eye to το Γρύλισμα instead, she must have one of her own, or maybe Tarantino has one, though he’s wealthy so he’s probably feeding το Γρύλισμα του all it needs and keeping it fat, bloated and satisfied. One should never waste food in the midst of an economic depression, you never know where you next meal might come from. “Τώρα δεν είμαι πια ο τρόμο-Ορφέας, τώρα είμαι o τρόμο-Όμηρος.”, and you need an epic horror story to sing verses about that future generations will learn in school in 2500 years’ time. With your eyes missing you are reminded of Story of an Eye by Georges Bataille. Not that you’ve actually read that book but you already know most of the story because every girl you’ve ever met has read it and always wants to talk to you about it as if you’ve read it too. You blame yourself because you sang: “This is the story of how my eyes changed.” in one of your more popular songs. Some of these girls ask you whether you’ve ever thought about filming Bataille’s story, and would you please like to consider them for the female lead. If the cinema were truly liberated like it was once long ago in the 1970s, Martin Scorsese would’ve already adapted Story of an Eye for the big screen instead of some lame costume drama like The Age of Innocence, and no one would’ve asked you whether you’d like to film it yourself because everyone would be busy watching Scorsese’s Story of an Eye. Not that you would mind doing your own version, in fact once you did apply for film-funding in France hoping to make a huge French-Greek co-production. Story of an Eye would’ve been a good option to bring to the table, but the French Film Fund only funds French film-makers so you were out of luck as a Greek bourgie trash nobody with a resume consisting of a handful of Todd Solondz rip offs, a huge glaring gap, and then some weird-ass dystopian sci-fi almost no one can sit through. You even cautiously left out all your trash-movies and porno-movies from your resume fearing that listing those would prejudice the board of the French Film Fund against you, but this cover-up of the true extent of your output still didn’t help to get you funds. Besides, you’re now in the S&M porno business, not in the horror porno business, or the disrobed costume drama business, and as a professional pornographer you have to deliver a specific product so that people know what they are paying for. Sometimes you get confused with the genre-mixing yourself. You enjoy the absolute darkness of not seeing anything at all for a change. The girl next to you cannot tell a thing because as far as she’s concerned you are still looking at her with the same frozen stare you had before το Γρύλισμα sucked your eyes out. “Πρέπει να σε νιώσω!” you exclaim, and to your surprise she takes your hands and puts them on her breasts. Instead of feeling the irritated nipples you were shooting earlier in the day through her shirt you feel sharp, pointy teeth the size of ivory tusks. Το Γρύλισμα, mouth wide open, is breathing into your face, the stench has the whiff of your eyeballs. You place your hands on it’s tongue. As soon as it senses the sour taste of your dirty hands it briefly recoils with a shiver of the tongue, then instantly locks its jaws tight. You feel your hands break away from your body at the wrists. You enjoyed hands melting away like candlewax in an acid bath of insect vomit in Cronenberg’s The Fly much better than this rather uninspired version of losing your hands. “Δεν έχω χέρια να γυρίσω την σελίδα ούτε μάτια να αντικρίσω την ελπίδα.”.

References:

Kill Bill, The Fly, Story of an Eye,

το Γρύλισμα appears courtesy of ΜΟΥΣΙΚΟ ΚΙΝΗΜΑ: (ΜΑΥΡΕΣ) ΤΡΙΧΕΣ.

Various songs and Facebook entries by The Boy.

 

 

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One Trackback/Pingback

  1. […] about him bein a pedophilia apologist. The story I rediscovered in my archive was titled: “Your eyes, your hands and the girl next to you”… Could it be that Alex was subconsciously referencing my story title in his tribute to Mary? […]

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